Character-That Which Defines You and Sets You Apart

If it's one thing that I believe makes us stand out from everyone else it is our character. Our character defines who we are. In a world where society ignores certain issues, tells us how to live and act, tries to control what we do, and puts pressure on us to be a certain way it is important that we maintain our strong character and stand up for what we believe in. Too many people follow the crowd because they yearn for acceptance. They are quick to just trade in their beliefs to be popular and to be liked by everyone else. Instead of standing out, they blend in with everyone else because they choose to become just like the rest of the world.

But why be like the rest of the world? Why do what they want us to do? We should have the strength to take control of our own lives and not let anyone else dictate how we live or tell us what we can or cannot do. I have always been the type of person who has stood up for what I believe in, not caring what others say or think about me. Speaking out about abuse and the damage it causes, putting myself out there and sharing my story, and following my heart by being passionate about an issue that goes ignored by society sometimes makes me enemies. I have had people tell me that I should not just put my life story out there like I do. I've had people tell me not to write, that I'm not emotionally stable enough to help others. I've had people say that I make everything up and that I still play the role of a victim. However, I disregard what they say because I know the truth about what happened in my own life. They were not there so how can they tell me what happened in my past when they weren't the ones present when everything happened? Instead, I take all those negative things people say about me, all the discouraging remarks they make towards me, and I use them as my inspiration and motivation to keep doing the work that I do.

I'm not the type of person to just sit there and say nothing. There are some people who expect others to walk around on eggshells and hide the truth about things. I wasn't raised that way though. I was not raised or brought up to just walk on eggshells and I refuse to walk on eggshells around anyone either. Walking on eggshells and being cautious about what we say is not living. Change cannot happen in this world if we are always tiptoeing around issues that need to be brought to attention. How can we expect things to get better and how can we expect to see things change if we do not speak up and stand up for what we believe in? No, standing up for what you believe in is not always going to make you popular. You may very well find yourself standing alone. But I believe it is better to stand alone then to follow the crowd and remain silent while we watch lives being shattered apart. It is worth the risk to speak out and stand up to those who oppose us. If we just run away from our fears all the time, then we will never accomplish or achieve anything and we will just lose battles in our lives. We cannot allow fear to hold us back from doing what we were meant to do.

I remember when I was younger, I use to be so afraid of my father. Often, I would hide from him and not go around him. I was very careful about what I said or did around him because I never knew what would set him off. So I felt helpless and trapped, feeling there was nothing I could do to get out of my situation. All that changed though when I found the courage to stand up to my father. True, my father did not appreciate that I stood up to him, but I knew that if I did not stand up to him, I would always live my life feeling miserable, helpless, and trapped. I had to take that chance and take that step to stand up to him to show him that I was not going to let him continue to hurt my mom or hurt me. I found the strength that had been in me the whole time when I finally stood up to my dad. We will never know what true courage is and we will never know what we can do if we just stand there and do nothing.

People will say they believe in something, that they stand for something, but yet they don't take action to put their dreams in motion. They don't do anything to start a change or make a difference. We need to be able to back up our words and show something for it if we're going to sit there and claim that we are about something or that we believe in something. I've never been about popularity or being noticed. I speak out and stand up for what I believe in because I want to make a difference in this world, I want to see a change, and I want to help save innocent lives from being shattered apart from the abuse that goes on. Any time we take the lead, step up, and begin to make a change then we must expect that we will have those out there who are against us. However, if we listen to them and allow them to bring us down with their words, we let them have the victory in our lives. I don't know about you, but I want to have the victory in my own life and I don't want someone else having control over any part of my life especially when I have fought long and hard to get this far in my journey. I was a victim in my own life for way too long, I was trapped in silence for way too long, and I never want to play the victim role again.

One of my heroes in life is Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. I wish I could have met that brave, courageous leader. The reason why he is my hero and inspiration in life is because he never backed down in what he believed. He went through so much oppression by standing up for what he believed in. Dr. King, though, had passion and he believed in what he was doing. He followed his heart and set out to make a change in this world. He paved the way, leaving his footprints for later generations to follow. He took risks and chances but he wasn't afraid to take them. Dr. King was definitely a man who had strong character. Even today, his teachings and his legacy live on. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. is definitely an inspiration to me because when I look at all that he achieved and all that he did, it just motivates me even more to get out there and make a change and a difference in the world around me. One day, when my life is over, I want to be remembered as a person who was not afraid to stand up for what I believed in and who had the determination and courage to follow my heart and have the passion and fire to make a difference in the lives of others. Honestly, I would rather be known for my character instead of my reputation. I can't remember where I read it or heard it, but I heard one time that character is more important than reputation because unlike reputation, character cannot be ruined or destroyed.

People can set out to ruin my reputation and say whatever they want about me. However, it is my character that defines me, not my reputation. My character is what sets me apart from the rest. It is what makes me who I am. I'm not one to give up on my dreams just because others say I can't achieve them. Go ahead, tell me I can't because I will show you that I most certainly can. When I hear someone tell me "I can't" it just fuels the fire and gives me that drive to show them that I can.

Character is what sets you apart and defines you. Don't get caught up in being accepted by the in crowd and doing what they want you to do. Life is like a game of chess where you must decide your next move but don't let someone else control you as if you are nothing more then a pawn. Take control of your own life. Stand up for what you believe in even if it means making sacrifices and standing alone. I'd rather stand alone than just give into everyone else and abandon my beliefs, my dreams, and my goals. The time is now for us to make a change and a difference in this world. Why wait to go after what we want when we can start now? Don't just say that you believe in something or stand for something; back your words up and take action to start making a difference and change in this world. The more we wait, the more time we waste. I'll leave you with a quote on character that I came across to give you something to think about and to me, it's one of the best quotes on character that I have heard,

"True character is not shown through doing what others expect and want. True character is shown by standing up for what you believe in, no matter how unpopular it may be."

-Jay Goldman
Co-Founder, Never Quit-


Something to think about. Would you rather be known by your reputation and do whatever everyone else wants you to do, or would you rather be known for your character and as someone who has the courage, determination and strength to take a stand even if it means standing alone?